What Did You Do at School Today?

Nothing.

Nothing?

Well, nothing much.

You did nothing much all day long?

Well . . . alright Mum, if you really want to know,
I had 4 lessons
and 45 minutes of playtime
in which I went around with 3 friends.
For lunch I had 22 baked beans,
2 1/2 fishfingers, a 1/4 of a bread roll
and 1 banana.
I fed Nibbles, the class hamster,
2 sunflower seeds.
I wrote 1 poem.
I got 7/10 for a spelling test.
I did 16 fairly tricky maths questions.
And…I learnt 5 very interesting things
about the Ancient Egyptians, including
how they used to remove the brains
of their dead with a hook - MUM…
DO YOU EVER LISTEN TO A WORD I SAY?

Oh sorry darling, what was that?

I said I removed my teacher’s brain today!

What? Oh well done, you!

What would you like for tea?


from Journey To The Centre Of My Brain! (Macmillan, 2012), © James Carter 2012, used by permission of the author and the publisher

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6I'm the Boss of the Universe

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7TheReallyReallyReallyTrulyTrueTruthAboutTeddyBears

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11How to Turn Your Teacher Purple

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12Is Your Teacher an Alien?

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14What Did You Do at School Today?

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15An Ode to My Brain

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34Journey to the Centre of My Brain

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35The Wolf Outside

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37Tree

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38The Trespasser

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