Headliners

HEADLINERS

HE SAID THAT NECROPHILIA WAS NOW LEGAL
PROVIDED YOU CAN FIND A CONSENTING PARTNER.

MAKE NO BONES ABOUT IT:
CREMATION IS THE WAY TO GO.

JOIN THE GOVERNMENT BOOKMAKING SCHEME:
PUT YOUR MONEY ON A GOOD NIGHT'S REST.

OR JOIN THE JESUS SURFERS CLUB:
WE WALK THE WAVES.

TRY THIS ON MY TOMBSTONE:
I ALWAYS FANCIED SOME TIME ALONE.

THE INSURMOUNTABLE PROBLEMS THAT FOLLOW DIVORCE:
WHO GETS TO KEEP THE COPY OF ULYSSES, THE CD OF DEAD KENNEDYS?

EVER THOUGHT YOU WERE IN THE WRONG JOB:
A PRIEST HOPS OVER A FENCE TO AVOID HIS PARISHIONERS.

I INHERITED THE GENE OF BLACK URINE:
BATHTIMES ARE NOT SO SUBTERFUGE.

I ALWAYS INHERITED THE GENE OF THE SKELETAL FISH:
I FIND MY OWN BONES BETWEEN MY TEETH.

HE SAID HE HAD MET HENDRIX, PRAISED THE LOOKS OF HIS DAUGHTER & GLOATED OVER MY WIFE:
NEXT DAY I FOUND HE WAS THE CREATOR OF THE SEX-CRIME GENRE.

THERE ARE TWO HOLES IN A FENCE IN BNP COUNTY:
IF A WHITE CONICAL HAT APPEARS, THAT'S NOT MR WHIPPY.

THE STRUCTURE IS A SICK FISH:
THE WAY IT SWIMS IS HOW IT IS.

ALL CATHOLICS LAPSE HE SAID:
YOU KNOW, LIKE DOGS MOULT IN SUMMER.

ANGELS WITHER LIKE TOES IN ANKLE SOCKS:
THEY BLISTER AS WE WATCH MTV.


from Zeppelins (Salt, 2008), © Chris McCabe 2008, used by permission of the author and the publisher.

Sponsor this poem

Would you like to sponsor this poem? Find out how here.

Recordings

Chris McCabe

Chris McCabe Downloads

1#1336: 1938

£0.89

2#800: ivor cutler

£0.89

3#1061: Sunday morning

£0.89

4#1463: Michael Jackson

£0.89

5from The Hutton Inquiry

£0.89

6A Note for Sarah

£0.89

7Radio

£0.89

8Axis is

£0.89

9The Pete Doherty in Prison Poem

£0.89

10Headliners

£0.89

11A Proposal

£0.89

12The Nuptials

£0.89

13A 98p Voicemail Message to Blaise Cendrars

£0.89

14Stetson's Book of Days

£0.89

15Battersea

£0.89

16Islington

£0.89

17Dovecot, Liverpool

£0.89

18No Hawkers

£0.89

19Good Friday

£0.89

20Zeppelins

£0.89

21Seven Perspectives

£0.89

22from THE RESTRUCTURE

£0.89

23from The Borrowed Notebook

£0.89

Books by Chris McCabe